Old Suzhou

 The old town of Suzhou - the ancient city that everyone refers to as "downtown" - is known throughout China as a historical landmark.   The city is criss-crossed by canals and has a large assortment of traditional gardens.  Much of the city has been modernized, but there are still many areas with traditional houses and streets too narrow for modern traffic.  These have become tourist traps ... but not in a gaudy, artificial way.  They still have an atmosphere of authentic, old-style Chinese city life.

 These are photos of an Ping Jiang road, which is one of the better known Suzhou-style canal streets.

 The above, I assume, is an old neighborhood well.

 Though you don't have to dodge the cars, you still have to dodge the bikes.

Hot

Suzhou temperature on Friday at 4:00 pm our time.  (Courtesy of weather.com).

Everyone says it's hot... and that it will get much worse before summer is over.   Luckily,the forecast calls for a small break next week, with rain coming in and temperatures dropping into the 70s.

Lost in Translation

The only comfort that comes in struggling with the Chinese language is knowing that the Chinese also struggle with English.  It is almost a game to look for bad translations when you go out - like playing "Where's Waldo" or "Padiddle".  There are gems all around just waiting to be found.  And if you're not in China, then Google the word "Chinglish" and you will be provided with hundreds of examples.

Now, don't get me wrong.   I'm not making fun of or faulting the Chinese for this.  It is their country and the fact that they provide any information in English is a huge courtesy.  And I'm sure that if the State of Indiana suddenly required Chinese translations then our visitors would be laughing at our mistakes.  Heck, some of our English signage is almost unreadable.

But social commentary aside, the translations can be pretty funny.

The best one I've seen was on a menu in Hainan.  The item was translated as "Pork in Nausea Sauce".  Unfortunately, I have no photographic evidence.  But if you don't believe me, then click on THIS LINK.

In Europe, you can find some pretty stunning examples of bad translation too.  But not so many as in China.   I think it has less to do with history or commerce with the English, and has everything to do with the fact that Chinese is just sooooo different at the most fundamental levels.   Thanks to the Romans, the languages of Europe all work in pretty much the same way.  The words may be different, but they can all be traced to some common Latin (or Germanic) root word.  The syntax...or the way you express a thought...is also pretty similar.  If you want to translate from French to Spanish, then you just follow a formula.  Replace this word with that one an this expression with another...and you are good to go. 

Chinese, on the other hand, tends to defy easy formulas for translation.   For example, there is no such thing as verb conjugation....no singular, plural, first-person, third-person, past, present, subjunctive, imperative or any of that stuff is built into the word.  There is just the concept of the action.  For example, the word "Qu" means "go".  Who goes, how they went, when they go, how many have gone....all of that information is provided in other ways and by other stuff in the sentence.  So it is no surprise that many of the "Chinglish" examples show difficulty with expressing action....like "Be Closed" instead of "Closed"....or "Stop Climbing" instead of "Do not Climb".

Longer signs often seem to confuse the order in which ideas should be expressed...such as "the parking please locks up the windows and the doors".  This is because the Chinese put their sentences together in a different way to English or Romantic languages.   So no surprise that when translated the pieces come out in seemingly random order.

Then there are the precious translations such as "Pork in Nausea Sauce".   I'm guessing (just guessing) that these happen because Chinese words are much less precise and much more conceptual than English words.  There are something like 10,000 Chinese characters and about 150,000 English words.  So just looking at those numbers, it is no surprise that a Chinese word is going to be a little more broad in it's meaning.  In English, you add precision by choosing the right word.  In Chinese, you add precision by putting together words that conceptually paint the right picture.  When translated, the conceptual complexity gets stripped away - sometimes with unfortunate results. 

This doesn't just happen in Chinese.  The French, for example, often use the word "bordelle".  In a business meeting, it is common and perfectly acceptable for them to say "quelle bordelle !" as an expression of disgust.  To them, the word "bordelle" means this concept of disorganization, mess, and things being done for the wrong reasons.  But when you translate "bordelle" literally into English you get our word  "bordello"....which implies a much more precise and completely different thing.  The Spanish have a common saying that translates into English literally as "scratching one's testicles".   These expressions are normal in French and Spanish business conversations.  The literal translations would get you fired in the U.S.  So in comparison, a litte "pork with nausea sauce" is not such a bad thing.

The Best Barbeque in China

 If you're homesick for some good-old American comfort food, then the best deal in town is the Sunday afternoon barbeque at Zapata's Waterfront Bar and Grill.  Zapata's normally features a Tex-Mex menu, so any day is a good day to get a little home cooking.   But on Sundays, they throw a bona-fide barbeque food-orgy - all you can eat for 100 RMB per person (about $15).  Beef brisket, smoked ribs, pork, chicken, coleslaw, beans, salsa....it's like clicking your heels and going home to Kansas.

The story behind the barbeque has an interesting twist.  It starts with a Texan named Dave Henderson.  Dave had been in the Suzhou area for a couple of years working as a plant manager for a US company.   He got a little bored and was looking to do a little barbequing and somehow got hooked up with the folks at Zapata's.  They agreed to let him use their equipment if he would teach their chef, Jonathan, how to cook Texas-style.  So they started doing Sunday afternoon cook-outs for the fun of it.  A year or so later, they were joined by an Ohioan named Gordon (sorry...need to get his last name) who was also working in Suzhou as an expat.  Gordon saw the smoker on the back deck and asked if he could borrow it.  He had competed in barbeque competitions in the States with his Memphis-style recipes.  Before long, he was part of the Sunday cooking team.  With each passing week-end, they have increased the formidable assortment of dishes for the cook-out buffet.

So, the photo at the top shows the Sunday afternoon cooking team of Gordon (from the left, out of Ohio) Jonathan (center, Zapata's regular chef), and Dave (at right, from Texas).  They are holding in their hands the proof that they are the best barbeque team in China.  Just the day before, the competed in the Shanghai Barbeque Cook-off.  They walked away from the competion with the awards for the best beef, the best pork, and the overall grand champion.  There were 19 or so teams entered, including a number of high-end Shanghai restauranteurs.  In the end, this meld of two American amateurs and one Chinese professional walked away with the award for the best barbeque in China.

Dave, by the way, is a Purdue graduate from the Krannert School of Business.  He also played football for Purdue back in the mid-1970s...when they were actually pretty good.   Those were the years of Leroy Keyes and Mark Hermann and coach Alex Agase.  I'm taking him at his word on this.  His word and his scars.  For all the scars he showed me, I have no doubt that he was telling the truth.

Zapata's is down on the lakefront about a 5 minute walk from our apartment.  Truth-be-told, it is one of the reasons why I chose the apartment in the first place.  That, and the Starbucks Coffee shop next store.  The pairing meant that Theresa could walk to get a coffee to start her day and walk to get a margarita to end her day.  It is convenient.  But it's also a bit of a danger.   We went to Zapata's on Thursday for dinner and check out their quiz night.  Then we met some neighbors and got to talking with them and with the owners and some others and before you know it we were getting back to the apartment at 1:00 am in the morning.  That makes for a difficult Friday at work.

Fireworks

 The Chinese have an international reputation for fireworks.  You could say the same thing about the French and wine.  So what...you can find wine and fireworks in any country these days...right?

The first time I went to France I came to realize that wine was a very different thing there...it was not a special event but an integral part of everyday life.  The same is true for the Chinese and their fireworks.   We can put on an occasional good show in the US, but in China the fuses are lit day-in and day-out.

 On any given day at work, I hear fireworks going off 5 or 6 times.   During the day.   This is when businesses set them off to mark grand openings or other auspicious business events.  I used to go to the window to try to see, but stopped when the native Chinese laughed at me.   "Only three-year-old children run to the windows when they hear fireworks", they told me.   When the explosions go off, they don't even flinch.   I have to fight the urge to duck and cover and pee my pants.   It sounds like a war zone, some times.  Actually, it sounds like a war zone most times.

There is a break in the action from about 4:00 pm until sunset.   Once it starts getting dark, then the mortars start up again.  This time it is for special events or for weddings or birthdays or who knows what.  The other night, there was a good, solid 90 minutes where fireworks were being launched almost continuously.  Not all from the same location.  But probably from 5 or 6 different places within a mile of us.  About the time one location would finish up their fun, another would start up.  Not every night is so filled with fireworks.  But there is not a night I can remember that did not have at least one display.

Kites

Imagine you are playing the old Family Feud game. If asked to name "Chinese Outdoor Activities", then what would you say???   Odds are, somewhere in you list you would include:

1. Paper Lanterns
2. Kites
3. Fireworks

In the previous post, we've already confirmed that you will indeed find a lot of paper lanterns in the night sky.  In this post, we can confirm that you will also find a lot of kite-flying going on.  Kites are difficult to photograph because the darn things tend to disappear in the expanse of the open sky.   But hopefully these two photos give you a feel for the number of people out flying kites at the lake-side park on a typical Saturday.  (By the way, those same vendors that sell paper lanterns at night will sell you a kite during the daytime.)

It's actually kind of fun to go down and watch the kite-fliers.   They range from the very serious hobbyists to the parents with children to the teen-agers playing around on a sunny day.  The whole range of human nature is represented.  The most fun thing to watch, though, is when the bicyclists passing through get tangled up in the kite string.

Paper Lanterns

When Jake was of Doctor Seuss bed-time book age, one of his favorite stories was "Tubby and the Lantern".  The story was of a Chinese boy and his pet elephant and how they accidentally flew off into the night sky on a giant paper lantern.  As children's literature goes, the book one of my favorites.  The plot was a little implausible but the characters were much stronger than the ones in "Green Eggs and Ham" or "Go Dog Go".

Anyway, one night Theresa was looking out the apartment window and saw a strange light in the sky above the lake.  We argued for about 5 minutes as to whether it was a plane or a helicopter or a star or a UFO.  Then another appeared.  We argued some more.  With time, both lights disappeared.

A few nights later we discovered the answer when we went down to the lakefront for dinner.   When coming home we found vendors selling baubles to the evening crowd, much like the vendors you find outside of U.S. amusement parks at closing time.  They were selling light sabres and glow-in-the-dark necklaces and whirlybirds and such.  Then we saw one selling paper lanterns.

And now most nights, we make it a point to look out at around 9:00 in the evening.  It is not unusual on the week-ends to see 4 or 5 lanterns at a time in the sky, rising up from the lake front and floating on the breeze. The sight brings back warm memories of reading the Tubby story in cozy beds to small children - our children who are long since adults.  

We've not yet seen any elephants hanging on to the lanterns.  We'll keep looking. 

Snakes for Sale - Pets or Meat

Theresa was in downtown Suzhou last week and saw this fellow camped out on the sidewalk.  He's selling snakes.  What kind of snakes?  Where from?  What for?  Since he didn't speak English, the answers will never be known.

Magnificent Desolation

I was backing up the photos from Theresa’s IPhone the other day and came across these photos taken on her plane flight.

Thanks to the magic of Great Circles, the air route from Chicago to Shanghai takes you over the top of the world.  The majority of the trip is spent over the arctic wastelands of Northern Canada, Alaska, Siberia, and Mongolia.  If the skies are clear, the views can be jaw-droppingly beautiful.

Like every kid that grew up in the 60s I wanted to be an astronaut.  The rockets and all that were cool, but I think the real attraction was the thought of traveling to otherworldly places….of seeing something totally alien to the cornstalks of Indiana.  I loved the pictures of the earth’s curved horizon from high above.  Or the cratered landscapes in the photos from the moon landings.   “Magnificent Desolation” is what Buzz Aldrin called it when he went there.

Being in a jet at 40,000 feet on a cloudless day over the arctic is about as close as I’ll ever get to being an astronaut.   And honestly, I think it is close enough for me.  Yes, it is only 7 miles above the earth instead of the 100 miles for Alan Shepard or the 200,000 miles for the moon crews.  But it’s still high enough to see the curve of the earth on the horizon.  And on a cloudless day, the desolation of the arctic is just as magnificent as anything the moon might offer.

The Royal Wedding

 In her second week here, Theresa went to one of the coffee "meet and greets" that the Suzhou Expats association holds every week.  She meeted and greeted and has since parlayed those first contacts into a growing network of companions.   As with us, they are here because one half of a married couple is employed by one or another of the Western companies that are located in Suzhou.  Some are American, some British, some Australian, some French.  But in China, the national differences are far less than the common bond of being an  English-speaking minority.

Most of her friends are old-timers compared to us.  This is a good thing.  For the most part, if you don't speak Chinese then the only way you learn anything is by word of mouth through your buddy network.  So the more expats one knows, and the more experienced those expats are, then the greater will be the shared knowledge.  Need to find a good doctor?  Cool Ranch Doritos?  Tilex Bathroom Cleaner?  Then put the question out to your network and wait for the answers to come back.

So anyway, a week ago Friday one of Theresa's buddy network - a lady from the UK - clued us in to a Royal Wedding Party in Old Suzhou.  The party was being hosted at an English Pub called the Drunken Chef.  The story goes that the owner of the pub - Clive - married a local woman years ago and has lived in Suzhou forever. He opened the pub to grace Suzhou with a small slice of his British homeland.  He serves traditional pub food and plays all the soccer matches and F1 races on the big screen TV.

Due to the magic of time zones, the Royal couple was scheduled to say "I do" at approximately 7:00 pm China time.  The timing could not be more perfect for a dinner party.  So Clive put the BBC International coverage on the big screen.  He also served up an all-you-can-eat food orgy complete with roast pork and Yorkshire pudding.  And as a nice touch, he held a contest for the woman sporting the best wedding hat and awarded a bottle of champagne (actually, Chinese sparkling wine) to the lucky winner. 

It was a great meal and a fun party.  But back to the whole word-of-mouth-buddy-network thing.  The Drunken Chef (Clive's eponymous pub) sits on the back side of a shopping center on a blind alley.  You would never find it by accident.  Heck, I could hardly find it on purpose.   The taxi driver got lost on the way.  The only way you could know the location of the Drunken Chef is because someone else took you there for your first time.  And someone else had to take that person there for their first time.  And so on, and so on, back to the beginning of time.

So that's why Theresa's buddy network is a good thing, if not an essential thing.  It's our tribe.  For all the modern world of the printing press and the internet and all that, our situation here is not too much different from stone age times.  All knowledge is tribal knowledge.  You learn from the elders of the tribe.   And when the elders expire (actually, their work permits and visas expire) then the next generation takes their place. And so on, and so on, until the end of time.

Are These Azaleas?

 In the Suzhou Industrial Park, they've put a lot of effort into the landscaping.   They sidewalks are for the most part bordered with trees on one side and hedges on the other.  Several weeks ago, the trees blossomed and I was able to pick out that there were cherries, plums, magnolias, and crab apples.

In just the past week or so, the hedges have started to bloom.   With a vengence they've bloomed.  They form a trail of purple that goes on for miles at some points.  And the air is heavy with the smell of flowers.  (either that, or it's the smell of a chemical spill.)

It's very pretty.  I'm thinking these are azaleas, but I'm not sure. Answer anyone?

What's Wrong WIth This Picture ?

Here's a story that is kinda related to our trip to Hainan, but not really......

Look at the photo at the top?  Do you see anything wrong?  Anything? Anything? Bueller?  Bueller?

As a Westerner in Suzhou, it is easy to form the impression that China has adopted and adapted to Western culture to the point of complete comfort.  After all, the city is full of Western companies and Western restaurants and there is no shortage of English-speaking-Chinese people in the hotels and restaurants.  It seems as if China has become a cosmopolitan melting pot and it's people are fluent in all the ways of the world.

But that's not completely true.

The fact is that there is only a thin veneer that specializes in dealing with the Westerners.  Don't get me wrong, China is developing remarkably fast...but it is developing as China, and not some hybrid love-child from a marriage between East and West.   I think the vast bulk of the population never sees a foreigner.  And those that do have consciously chosen to work for an international company, or consciously chosen to work in the western-oriented service industries that take care of the visitors that come with the international companies.

If Theresa and I would have decided to go to Hainan on our own, then we would have contacted one of the local travel agencies that advertises in the local English magazine.  We would have visited them, talked to them in English, and they would have taken care of us.  It would seem natural and normal.  And we probably would have no idea whether we were getting a good deal or not.

Our trip to Hainan was organized by our co-workers at the plant site.....by Chinese people who went to a travel agency....a normal travel agency....and not one that expected to charge a premium for helping gullible foreigners.  They worked out a good deal which allowed us to travel to Hainan for a price that I'd never be able to negotiate on my own.

There was an odd thing about the experience, though.   Since the travel agents had to arrange the airplane tickets, they asked all the travellers to provide our names exactly as they appeared in our passports....which Theresa and I did.  When we were given our boarding passes at the airport, Theresa and I were horrified to realize that the travel agency did not know how Western names work.  They assumed our names worked just like all the other Chinese names in our tour group... where the family name comes first and then the given name come after. 

So, that's what's wrong with the opening photo.  Instead of getting boarding passes that said "Weber/Theresa" and "Weber"/James" we got ones that said "Theresa/Ann" and "James/Clarence".  Compare the photo at the top (the screwed up names for Hainan) with the photo below (which was booked through the US and done correctly.)

I figured that there was no way we would get through security at the airport.  In the US, if the name on your boarding pass does not perfectly match your ID card then the security guys will bounce you in a heartbeat.  Trying to travel under a wrong last name is probably enough to get you on a TSA watch list.  But luckily, we were in Shanghai (and not Chicago) and we were taking a domestic flight from the domestic terminal where 99% of the travellers are Chinese.   The security guards checked our passports against the boarding passes and never batted an eye.  It looked perfect to them too.

There was one other strange thing about the trip.  If it was me making travel arrangements on my own, I would have had to pay the travel agency up front with a credit card.  However, the arrangement struck between the Chinese and this travel agent was that everyone would pay cash before getting on the bus to go to the airport.  3200 RMB per person was the cost.  So for 30+ people, the tour guide ended up collecting quite a bit of cash - almost 100,000 RMB or $16,000. 

And 100,000 RMB is REALLY a lot of cash to carry.  In China, the largest bill they make is a 100 RMB note.  Theresa and I alone turned in a stack of 64 bills to cover our cost.  By the time the agent collected all the cash, he had roughly 1000 bills to carry around.  It looked like a stack of bricks.

Wrapping It Up - Miscellaneous Images of Hainan

The trip to Hainan lasted only four days....but I will drag it out forever in these postings if I'm not careful.  So here are a few random images to wrap up the story.   First of all, tropical fruit.  Above is Andy posing with an underage bunch of bananas.  Below, are pineapple plants.

 

Let's stay with the agriculture theme.  We'll move from gardening to livestock.

Above is the poultry market in Sanya (just behind the fishmarket).  You know the chicken is fresh because it's still clucking when you choose your bird.  You can take it home alive, or they will kill it, gut it, and pluck it for you while you wait.  Below, fresh chicken feet on display in the market.  (Chicken feet are hugely popular as finger food - you brown them in oil, then steam them to plump them up, and then you glaze them with Chinese barbecue sauce.) 

 Below, a statue of a boy riding a water buffalo.

 Below, a real water buffalo grazing in a rice paddy.

Below, modern boats for recreation.

 Below, traditional boats for the fisherman.

 

 Finally, we end with a couple of photos of fast food shops at the beach.  The stand below is selling grilled, skewered seafood and vegetables.  Nothing like fish on a stick for the hungry surfer.

And below are the ubiquitous coconuts of Hainan.  Everywhere you go, you will find a stand selling these as a drink.   You pay the man (or lady) 10 yuan and they whip out a machete, whack away the husk, stab a hole into the center, and then stick a straw in so you can suck out the coconut water.

It's actually a pretty refreshing drink.  And not just a tourist thing.  Theresa and I flagged down a taxi one afternoon to go to Dadaon Hai Beach.   As we were going through town, the taxi driver said something in Chinese and then stopped the cab in the middle of the road and got out in a hurry.  There were no bushes around, so he obviously was not going to the taxi-driver's-bathroom.  I was beginning to worry that we'd just learned the Chinese words for "car" and "explode".  Then he jumped back in the car with a coconut.  He whipped the car back into gear and drove to the beach, sucking the liquid out of a coconut the whole time.

Tianya Haijiao

 A popular attraction in the Sanya area is Tianya Haijiao, or the "Edge of Heaven and Corner of the Seas".   The tourist information brochures say the popularity comes from the fact that this is the farthest South you can go and still be in China.  Also, they say, people come to marvel at the stunning rock formations on the beach left by dragons in ancient times.

 Our friends from Suzhou tell a more interesting story about the origins of the park.   According to urban legend, a Chinese mainlander moved to Hianan back in the early 1990's when China was starting to open up it's economy.  Developers were starting to go nuts with the building of hotels and resorts.  But the man only had 2000 yuan in his pocket - about $250 dollars. 

At that time, the "edge of heaven" was a lousy stretch of beach that was too rocky for agriculture or commercial uses.  No one wanted to go there.  But our man had a brilliant idea..... He approached the government and asked them if he could lease the land for 1000 yuan.  They thought the land worthless and agreed to the lease.  Then the man used his remaining 1000 yuan to build a fence and a ticket booth.  Once he started charging admission, then people naturally assumed that it must be something worth seeing since it cost money to see it.  So people came from all the world and paid him money to see the rocks.  And our man became rich - rich beyond the dreams of common men.

I like the urban legend better than the tourist brochures.  The story says a lot about the Chinese spirit of today, and their belief that anyone can get rich....especially by capitalizing upon the foibles of human nature.  It also reminds me of the story of "Stone Soup" that Captain Kangaroo used to read from time to time.